I want a skinny brit with a blue box to materialize outside my front door.

My automatic way of dealing with stress is to fixate on one topic/story and play around with it in my head. Right now, it's Doctor Who and David Tennant. Damnit, I want a TARDIS. And a Tennant.

I am stressed. Not about leaving, but about getting ready to leave. Packing is a nightmare; I sit in the guest room surrounded by mountains of stuff and just don't even know where to start. I'm starting to feel a little out-of-body and dwelling more and more in my head than with my family. I think that I am unconsciously stressed about leaving and am just burying it under mountains of denial.

I was in Pittsburgh a few days ago, an impromptu trip. I had the last-minute opportunity to get a free IUD at the Magee outpatient clinic, and I jumped at the chance (without insurance, and I have no insurance, it would have been over $500!) Of course, it wasn't until after I drove for five hours and had the extremely painful procedure that I looked into it and realized that not all countries in the PC support it. After mountains (mountains!) of stress and a sleepless night, I found out that Ecuador does indeed support it, and I am A-Ok. I feel like I just dodged a bullet.

Moral of the story is, don't do ANYTHING, major or minor, without checking with the PC. You never know what could happen.

Pittsburgh was amazing, though. It felt so strange to drive into that city that I lived in for four years. I loved seeing everyone again, and I am so thankful to have such friends. Thanks, guys! I also saw my sister for my mom's birthday (we cooked such amazing food!), and my bro for Valentines day. On my mom's birthday we sat around, drank wine and laughed and talked while the dogs tussled together on the floor, and I thought, this is love.

The house is quiet now. I leave in one week for Baltimore, and then on to DC. I have so much left to do that I haven't done, but instead I'm wasting time on this and fanfiction and impossible stories in my head. Writing has always been my escape, but sometimes it's like rushing water in my head, and I just can't see past it.